Anger and Ego

Anger and Ego are that two emotions that cloud our mind and create enormous negativity in our lives. These two emotions are highly destructive. I encounter it daily and I struggle with it myself. I think ego is the source of many problems in our lives. The "I", the "Me" drives this ego. With ego comes the anger - they are interconnected. Ego naturally leads to anger and anger causes the negative emotions which lead to strife, battles, war and destruction. When my ego is challenged or hurt, I get angry and upset. I wish to retaliate.

“Make your ego porous. Will is of little importance, complaining is nothing, fame is nothing. Openness, patience, receptivity, solitude is everything.”


I realize the ego and anger are inevitable part of our karma in this life. We cannot avoid them. They are easy to pop out. We just need to learn to catch this burning hot toast as it pops out of the toaster and dump it into the trash can. The more we do it, the less would we be inclined to feel challenged and hurt, and less will ego and anger pop out of the toaster.

"Even a big pot full of water  can be emptied by a small hole,

So a little Anger or Ego can burn  all the Nobility of a good heart."

Wisdom is to know the difference between EGO and SELF-RESPECT, and to become more aware towards these. When the ego is satisfied there is happiness, and when hurt, pain and irritation are experienced. But self-respect is beyond respect and disrespect. On being satisfied or hurt, under any circumstance, it inspires for karm. To satisfy the ego (ahankaar) people might indulge in manipulations, become calculative and avoid working hard towards growth, whereas self-respect (swabhiman) always propels one to work harder for self-satisfaction. Just like Shri Krishn inspired Arjun to fight for self-respect and self-duty.

A self-respecting human understands well the importance of self-respect and his duty towards it. He knows its value, whether it is his own, of others or of his nation or even the Earth.

It is very important to control ego and anger.

So, Let Go of you Ego …. Whenever you are wrong – Admit it and whenever you are right – Keep Quiet. This will surely keep the relationships strong. And like needles of a clock, strong relationships always remain connected even when they meet on few occasions.

6 simple steps for ego management.

* stop being offended.

The behavior of others isn’t a reason to be immobilized. That which offends you only weakens you. If you’re looking for occasions to be offended, you’ll find them at every turn. This is your ego at work convincing you that the world shouldn't be the way it is. Being offended creates the same destructive energy that offended you in the first place and leads to anger.

* Let go of your need to win.

Ego loves to divide us up into winners and losers. But ultimately, winning is impossible all of the time. Someone out there will be faster, luckier, younger, stronger, and smarter-and back you’ll go to feeling worthless and insignificant. Let go of needing to win by not agreeing that the opposite of winning is losing.

* Let go of your need to be right.

I’ve seen people end otherwise beautiful relationships by sticking to their need to be right. I urge you to let go of this ego-driven need to be right by stopping yourself in the middle of an argument and asking yourself, Do I want to be right or be happy?

Letting go of your need to be right in your discussions and relationships is like saying to ego, I’m not a slave to you. I want to embrace kindness, and I reject your need to be right. In fact, I’m going to offer this person a chance to feel better by saying that she’s right, and thank her for pointing me in the direction of truth.

* Let go of your need to be superior.

True nobility isn’t about being better than someone else. It’s about being better than you used to be. Stay focused on your growth, with a constant awareness that no one on this planet is any better than anyone else.

* Let go of your need to have more.

The mantra of ego is more. It’s never satisfied. No matter how much you achieve or acquire, your ego will insist that it isn’t enough.  when you stop needing more, more of what you desire seems to arrive in your life. Since you’re detached from the need for it, you find it easier to pass it along to others, because you realize how little you need in order to be satisfied and at peace.

* Let go of your reputation.

Your reputation is not located in you. It resides in the minds of others. Therefore, you have no control over it at all. If you speak to 30 people, you will have 30 reputations.  Leave your reputation for others to debate; it has nothing to do with you. Or in other words What You Think of Me Is None of My Business!

Humanity

Humanity is the quality of being human. I think bynow you might have understood what does it means to say. We are born as human being, we should behave like them only one shouldn't go against god's given nature.

        "Love and compassion are necessities, not luxuries.                              Without them humanity cannot survive." 

There is, of course, no end to the magnificence and horror in the human drama. Across the continents, humanity rises to every challenge, sinks to any depth. We cherish each heartbeat and murder at will. We bless nature’s miracles, yet trash the hood.

We accept this polarity as human nature then move on in our ‘glassy essence’. All the while our righteousness lords over other life; yet we beseech gods for mercy. Our anger flares to violence; yet we demand justice. We covet ceaselessly, give generously. Our wallowing is legion; yet we take science and the arts to Olympian heights.

Not least, so many suffer relentless poverty, each day wondering at living another; so many are refugees from disaster or violence, escaping under unfamiliar skies to avoid a closer death, grasping whatever it is they have left - a child, ragged clothes, a pot; so many are victims of injustice, of the vagaries of despotism or ill luck, with no legal system to which they can carry their hope.

Here is the best example that will force you to believe humanity do exists.

On February 2002 a tea vendor in Lucknow Aiku Lal Sandil finds a Muslim boy abandoned at a garden near his tea stall, when asked about his whereabouts the boy only remembers his name as Akbar, Aiku reports to police but the police were unable to trace the boy's parents as there was no complain registered on missing of a three year old boy in any of the police station all over the state. 

After loosing hope police advice Aiku to shift the boy to an orphanage, Aiku refuses and brings up the boy on his own, Aiku has merge income but ensures the boy gets proper education and also retains Akbar's religion by taking him to a muslim clerk and making the child learn Quran and read Namaz daily. Soon a lovely relationship blossoms between a hindu man and a muslim boy and they both form a family of their own.

But their world turns upside down when the boy's biological parents turn up and seek the custody of boy, but the boy refuses saying Aiku is his father-mother and wants to stay with aiku, but the boy's biological parents go to court to claim akbar's custody. But court pronounces judgement in favor of Aiku and acknowledges aiku's upbringing of the boy by retaining his religion and providing education. During court proceedings we get insights about the life of aiku as how he was brought up with love an care by a Muslim family in spite of him being a Hindu.


“I am a Hindu brought up by a kind Muslim man. When I found Akbar, it was like God telling me that it is time to return the love and care I got from His people. I was never forced to change my religion and, having got that education from my guardian, it was my duty to take care of the child and bring him up as per his own religion,” Sandil says.  

I got to know about this story through Crime Patrol and when i first watched the episode i was moved by its message that showed us how Humanity is greater than religion and also the fact that love is out of bounds of religion and caste.

Everything has two sides, one is positive other negative, all that we have to do is to be always on positive facet and keep on working in that direction, you will be surely paid for that earlier or later. Have trust in god truth and humanity will triumph.